Here Are Some Grey Knights I Painted for My Nephew.

Because I am the best uncle in the galaxy.

If it's not WYSIWYG, it's WTF.

Besides unpainted miniatures, something I rail against vehemently and eloquently, something else that chaps my hide are miniatures that aren't WYSIWYG. (In case in you don't know, that means What You See Is What You Get- a concept that has been important to me since experiencing the painful frustration of trying to print documents on a dot-matrix using Appleworks.) I don't mind a few changes here are there, especially in a friendly game, but I have my limits. And those limits are rather stringent. 

"We, the miniatures on your shelf, demand to be represented accurately in your games of Warhammer 40k !"

Two variants of scout sergeants for different lists.

I remember playing a game against an unnamed family member and finding out I was assaulting a bunch Terminators that ran around in the form of regular power armor marines. Dice had already been rolled when those 2+ saves started coming out. I was not thrilled. I lost that assault, surprisingly enough, but kept playing cheerfully because I am not a complete asshole. But really, the bases are different, dude. 

These guys have plasma pistols, because, uh, their models do.

I despise having to listen to a long-winded pregame description of how this bolter is really a melta gun and this guy is really this and that and meow meow meow. I also don't want to take the time to scour a list for the fine details. I don't want to stop and point at miniatures and ask about them. Really. That's why GW makes all those nice little parts. If you want to make the most of those expensive models, consider using magnets to make gear and weapon loadouts interchangeable. Magnets are cheap and easy to use.

This gunner has been magnetized to change weapon load outs.

I work hard to buy and construct the units I will be playing. It's a sniper because it has a sniper rifle. It's got a plasma pistol because the model has a plasma pistol. That's a power fist because that's a power fist. I trade, buy, convert, scrounge, and beg for the pieces that will look like what the miniature is carrying. Get the bits and get to work. It isn't that hard if

you give the smallest of damns about what you're doing.



Internal magnets allow for other options.

 .





Can't decide on Typhoon launchers ? Now you don't have to !

 



Be Prepared

Here's how acute anxiety has paid off for me: I was, and continue to be, in various gigging rock bands. When I bring my guitar for a show, I bring two. Strings break and no one wants to wait while you restring. When I bring a cable, I bring two because you can't trust those things to work right. 9 volt batteries ? Got them. And extras. Extension cords. Check. Set lists. Done. If you're going to take the time to do it, do it right. 

The same goes for 40k. If you can spend hours trolling boards and squeezing every mathematical and fluffy nuance out of your rulebooks and codices, then you can make sure that what's on the table is what's on the table. 


These guys are sergeants because they look like sergeants.

In Summary

1. Please, don't make me wait while you glue at the game table.

2. Write your list at home. Let's roll the dice and play a game. The reason I stopped RPG's and started 40k was due to the fact that I am a grownup and have limited gaming time. Also, I can no longer enjoy being around other fat nerds for extended periods of time. With Warhammer 40,000, I can count on a rousing 6 rounds of fun and be off on my merry way.

 

3. WYSIWYG is the only way. 

Game on.

Even smoke can be WYSIWYG

2012: The New Year is Cupped Gently in My Hobbying Hands

2011 was a year of goal making, goal changing, goal reaching, and goal failure. Basically, everything you can think of happening with goals has happened. I would consider this hobbying year an overall success as my biggest goal was completed in mid-December: 

The Tau Empire Red Star Cadre

"Marshy Dogs" 

  

This has been an event several years in the making. When I first started 40k, I chose Tau due to my love of robot suits and my experience painting such machines from years of playing Battletech. I also wasn't initially in-love with the Gothic look of the other forces. The army has evolved significantly since I first started it, relying more on Kroot, Pathfinders and XV-88 Broadsides than the tank-heavy armored strike force I had originally conceived. I've written ad nauseum about the evolution of my army, so I will let the photos do the talking.

Notice that the Fire Warriors armored shoulders spell out my first name. Quite clever, really.

Kroot Mercenaries are one of my favorite parts of the army. I have four squads of twenty, plus a few hounds. 

All flight bases, seeker missiles, and most vehicle guns are magnetized to reflect in-battle conditions. 

Not a unit I use often, Stealthsuits just look cool and can be a nasty surprise under the right circumstances.

My normal lists consist of Devilfish transports for the Pathfinders only. The Piranhas, Hammerheads and Fire Warrior transports have all been dropped in most of my standard small-to-medium lists. In higher point games I love nothing more than prowling around with my hover tanks. Despite their big guns, excellent weapon load outs, and snazzy wargear, they don't normally last too long since they make stellar targets for tank-hunting enemy forces.

As I played more games and slowly developed more of my army, I have expanded my painted force to include objective markers and terrain. This sort of personalization is one reason why developing my own themed army has been so much fun. Without worrying about Codex insignia, I have included lots of silly details into my force including battlesuits with WWII-style-lady nose art, Chinese Communist regalia, and my name hidden into the Tau lettering. In-game, the one Fire Warrior standing up is always the first to die. 

Tau objective markers. My Chinese-speaking family has noted that my numbers are often upside down.

The Kroot objective marker: A big pile of bloody meat. 

A crashed Tau Devilfish. No doubt a leftover from the many, many battles this brave little army has lost. 

Finally, I must give thanks to all my 40k friends and family that have helped make this army what it is. Random generosity from fellow Warhammer players was an amazing and surprising  aspect of the game that one will never read about in any rule book. Thanks so much to: Chris Tabor, Andrew Snow, Andrew Bruch and Aaron Lurz for donating to the cause of the Greater Good. I hope I have done justice to your gifts. 

I still have plenty of random bits and units that I will be adding to this force in the future to expand the Tau Marshy Dogs to an even greater degree. Be on the lookout for some Krootox, Kroot Shapers, those pesky Vespids. 

2012 means more assault marines...

The Future: My goals for 2012

The first project is my Raven Guard Space Marines. Originally I had planned to have this done by the New Year, however I radically changed up my list since that announcement. I have added some Razorbacks, Rhinos and more Assault Marines. I have ditched the scouts in my rewritten list to make room for these armored elements. My goal is to have 2000 points painted by this time in 2013. This is currently my main focus and will continue to add battles to my ongoing Pinturama Campaign.  

Razorback with custom built plasticard "extra armor" plates.

"Extra armor" plates are magnetically attached.

The second major goal is my Ork army. I would like to have 1500 points done by this time in 2013. I have plenty of boyz and trukks built and ready to paint as well as some almost finished Deff Dreads and Killa Kanz. The theme for my army is "Roborktek Defenz Force" including plenty of stompa madness and trukk mounted boyz. 

Ah, the meditation of gluing things together.

My last hobby goal is improving the terrain I have. There is no reason that the sizable collection of Games Workshop ruins I have can't be painted to a higher standard than they are currently. I will be adding a feature post called "Terrain is Not that Hard" where I will be discussing my building of terrain. I believe that there is no excuse to have an ugly game table. Everything on the table should be beautiful. 

Drop pods are a total pain in the ass.

As far as this blog, I will continue my Pinturama Campaign as I complete elements of my Raven Guard strike force. Also, I plan to work on another set of articles detailing the many homoerotic Space Marine quotes from the Black Library series. I've been enjoying the Horus Heresy immensely, but have found an interesting trend in the observations of Space Marines afforded to their Primarchs and others.


"Ahriman's heartbeat spiked at the sight of them, the first a gloriously comparisoned warrior...his face was one of perfect symmetry...this was a living, breathing angel made flesh, whose countenance was the most beauteous in  existence..." (McNeil, Graham McNeil, A Thousand Sons) 


Let's be honest, there's alot of sweaty tussling among those Astartes. I have a feeling the Space Marines operate a lot like the historic Spartans in the arts of war and love.

Here's to 2012, let the Nerditry March Onward.

That Space Marine is totally checking out my ass.

The Pinturama Campaign: Kill Team on Luna Seta !

The Pinturama Campaign is a combination painting challenge and campaign, encouraging me to complete many of the unfinished models I have while integrating them into an ongoing campaign. Read the campaign outline here. The campaign background material can be found here.  Part one of the campaign, featuring the Space Marine probe into the foothold of the Tau invasion is here: Showdown on Sena'goso. The Tau counter attack on the Space Marines, The Vengeance of Mont'ka, details the continuation of that first deadly encounter. 

A lone Myconid rancher, tending his heard, watches a star fall onto the foggy plains of the Luna Seta countryside. Within hours, planetary defense forces receive a panicked vox transmission from an outlying corral."...slaughtered. Transmissions.....interference. We can't see anything. Send help..." And with those last words the vox fades to static. Following orders sent from the planetary comptroller, the corral location is immediately relayed to Captain Edgar, commander of the Raven Guard detachment in the capital fortress of Stinkhorn. Turning to the hulking armored forms behind him, he nods and the teleporter hums to life. "We have them now, Sergeant Dupin.Victorus aut Mortis."


Tau Infiltration Team
Total Roster Cost: 199

Shas'la Chi'r prepares to strike.

Elite: Stealthsuits (7#, 199 pts)

   1 Stealthsuits, 199 pts ((C:TE, pg. 35); Unit Type: Jump Infantry (Jet Packs); Stealth Armour; Fusion Blaster; Acute Senses; Deep Strike; Infiltrate; Relentless; Stealth Field)

Shas'ui Wo'bu leads his team on Sena'goso.

      1 Stealthsuits (Stealth Armour; Burst Cannon; Infiltrate; Stealth Field)

      1 Stealthsuits (Stealth Armour; Burst Cannon; Infiltrate; Stealth Field)

      1 Stealthsuits (Stealth Armour; Burst Cannon; Infiltrate; Stealth Field)

      1 Stealthsuits (Stealth Armour; Burst Cannon; Infiltrate; Stealth Field)

      1 Team Leader (Stealth Armour; Hard-wired Drone Controller; Burst Cannon; Fusion Blaster; Infiltrate; Stealth Field)

         1 Gun Drone (Unit Type: Jump Infantry (Jet Packs); Twin Linked Pulse Carbines; Relentless)

Shasla Go'ro in his XV15

Kill Team Specialists:Shas'ui Wo'bu, Team Leader. XV25 Stealthsuit modified with stimulant injectors, giving him the Feel No Pain special rule. Shas'la Chi'r: XV25 Stealthsuit supplied with experimental overdriven stealth field, giving him the Stealth universal special rule. Shas'la Go'ro: After working in the jungles of Sena'goso, Go'ro has grown adept at navigating his XV15 through difficult terrain and thus has the Move Through Cover universal special rule.

Sergeant Dupin teleports into the fray.

Sergeant Dupin's Response Squad

Total Roster Cost: 200

Elite: Terminator Squad (5#, 200 pts)

   4 Terminator Squad, 200 pts ((C:SM, pg. 64 & 136); Unit Type: Infantry; Power Fist x4; Storm Bolter x4; And They Shall Know No Fear; Combat Squads; Combat Tactics)

      1 Sergeant Dupin (Unit Type: Infantry; Power Weapon; Storm Bolter; And They Shall Know No Fear; Combat Squads; Combat Tactics)


Kill Team Specialists:
Sergeant Dupin's tactical dreadnought armor has an integrated-shield machine spirit giving him the Feel No Pain universal special rule. Brother Ligeia, an experience urban fighter, has the Move Through Cover special rule. Brother Usher has the Night Vision special rule thanks to the improved auspex of his ancient terminator armor. 

Brother Usher in his Terminator armor.

Brother Ligeia marches steadily into battle.

Order of Battle

• Mission: Kill Team

• Deployment: As per Battle Missions book, page 90

• Points: 200 

• Initiative: Tau win initiative and deploy first.

• Spoils of Victory The victorious army will receive an one extra roll for the chance to steal the initiative in a future battle.

The Tau infiltration force meets the Raven Guard terminators at the Myconid corral on Sena'goso.

A Myconid stampede can be frightening. Or silly.

• Battlefield Conditions: Sergeant Dupin's terminator squad has teleported directly into the Myconid corral that is being attacked by the Tau Stealthsuits. A small herd of Myconids, driven into a frenzy by the noise and lights, has started to stampede. They will move 2d6" in a random direction each round. The scatter dice will center on the yellow-spotted bull, and the raging herd extends in a 6" radius from him. Any unit in the Myconid herd receives a +3 cover save, but cannot shoot during its shooting phase. Furthermore, moving in, through, or out of the Myconid herd counts as moving through dangerous terrain. If the herd hits a wall or table edge, the herd will "bounce back" the remaining distance in the opposite direction. The herd moves at the end of each round, after both sides have finished their turn.

Round 1: The Stealthsuits break into 3 teams, attempting to flank and eventually surround their slower and less agile adversaries. They jump from cover and move forward to attack. Although their fusion blasters are out of range, their burst cannons are not. A lucky shot from Go'ro critically injures Brother Ligeia as he attempts to close rank. The Tau then use their jetpacks to jump back into cover and away from enemy reprisal.

Tau stealthsuits lay down a punish rain of plasma into the approaching Raven Guard Terminators.

The Tau jump out of view- frustrating the marines.

Dupin's squad splits into two, the terminator on the left pushing his way through the rampaging Myconid herd and running forward. The stealth systems on the Tau suits cause havoc with the Raven Guard's targeting auspices and several marines, including Sergeant Dupin, are unable to find them. Usher locates one and fires, but his storm bolter is unable to penetrate the enemy's armored suits.

The Myconid herd gallops away from the gunfire to the far side of the pen and remains out of the fighting for the rest of the conflict.

Round 2: The Tau continue to use their jetpacks to full advantage, leaping into range while firing at the oncoming Terminators. Shas'la Ch'ir scores a lucky hit against his foe as his burst cannon penetraties the ancient suit's most delicate systems and renders it unable to continue. The rest of the team, however, is not so fortunate. The remaining Raven Guard terminators march forward despite the intense fusillade. The stealthsuits jump away from the Space Marines and find cover.
 

Dupin furiously strikes down Ch'ir with his power sword.

Dupin, seeing his right flank weakened with the loss of his battle brother, splits off from the others and moves towards Go'ro and Ch'ir. His storm bolter is unable to hinder the Tau's battlesuit operation. In a furious close combat assault, he strikes the suit down with his power sword, easily pushing the energized blade through its armor in a swift killing strike. The rest of the squad continues to shoot, but are still unable to slow down the more agile Tau.

Wise use of cover gives the agile stealthsuits a significant advantage.

Round 3: The Tau continue their plasma-fueled onslaught and strike down another battle brother. Their nimble battlesuits allow them to surround the terminators and shoot at them from all directions, the volume of fire compensating for the relative hardiness of their enemy's tactical dreadnought armor. As quickly as they emerge and fire, they jump back into hiding and prevent Dupin's squad from effectively retaliating.

Dupin maintains his momentum despite his losses. Although their storm bolters fail to strike true, Usher and Dupin mangle their foe in close combat, easily striking down Ch'ir and another Tau stealthsuit in hand-to-hand melee. 

Round 4: With the remaining Raven Guard squad closing in and their own rate of fire significantly reduced, the Tau are unable to take down any more terminators. Wo'bu almost hits his target with a beam of super-heated plasma, but the marine makes good use of the Tau's own cover and the Shas'ui succeeds in only melting part of the barricade.
 
Dupin ignores the drone hounding his rear and targets another stealthsuit at close range. It explodes in a burst of explosive shells and lifelessly plummets to the ground. Usher closes in to assault Wo'bu in close combat, but the Tau leader manages to strike first at the terminator's vital components and shuts it down cold. 

Round 5: Desperate to the end battle quickly , Shas'ui Wo'bu continues to fight. He strikes Dupin down with his fusion blaster and unceremoniously ends the battle.


With the last of their enemy smoldering on the ground, Shas'ui Wo'bu orders the remaining stealthsuits to finish their mission. The tachyon beacons are fitted into place, Imperial  communication lines are severed and the Tau move quietly back into the night. Other infiltrated teams across Luna Seta report in and the next stage of the Tau invasion is begun. Mantas are boarded. Remora drones, prepared by Pathfinders already on-planet, are activated. Tiger Sharks and Barracudas race to their objectives. A salvo of missiles rise up from Sena'goso and swarm across the void to Stinkhorn, capital of Luna Seta. In a meticulously planned orchestration of explosions and landings, Lena Seta is under siege and all Imperial vox bands are overridden with a single repeating message. "People of Luna Seta: By right of settlement your planet is liberated from the heartless and callous rule of your Imperial overlords. Your uncaring emperor is dead. Submit to the Greater Good and enjoy unending peace and prosperity." 


Debriefing: Terminators are not as mighty as some may attest to.  A few unlucky rolls, and in the case of this match up, quite a few unlucky rolls, brings them down rather easily. If the Tau burst cannons all hit and wounded, there was a 125:216 (about 57%) that the Terminators would make their armor saves. Even two successful wounds meant a 25:36 chance of making their armor saves; about a 69% chance. These are hardly surefire odds. Compounding this problem were the two fusion blasters the Tau had, their stealth ability, and their jet pack ability to move, shoot and move again. Had the rolls been slightly different, the Space Marines might have won the day. As it was, their inability to wound with their storm bolters and close in for assaults sealed their fate.

The universal special rules made little difference, other than not targeting those units with Feel No Pain.   


Spoils of Victory: Their invasion well underway, the Tau may reroll a single chance to steal the initiative.


Next: Victorus aut Mortis !

Painting Countdown to 2012: Update

My favorite new Kroot of Carrot squad. His eyes say "Oh shit ! Look out !"

I have been painting my ass off. If I can also paint off my belly, that would be extra great for my self-esteem and chances of being shirtless at the lake this summer.

I have updated my goals a bit, working hard to have my 2000 point Tau list and my 1500 point Space Marine list completed by January 1st, 2012. I have also changed my Raven Guard list, adding in another tactical squad and their drop pod.  


Here's some pics of what I've finished since my last painting update...

Kroot Carnivore Squad "Carrot".

Kroot Hounds: Part of the 2000 point "Banana" squad. I got them second-hand without legs, so I made some. 

XV-88 Broadside with two shield drones. I have two done for my 1500 point Tau list.

Helios pattern Crisis suit. Possibly the last Tau battlesuit I will ever paint until new ones come out.

"Banana" squad member. All 10 for the 1500 Point list are done.

To complete my 1500 point Space Marines I need to finish:

• 3 drop pods, two for the Tactical Squads and one for the Dreadnought. These are built, primed, and base coated.

• 1 Chaplain with a jump pack. He is built and in the final stages of painting. I need to complete the details and flock. I was never happy with the first chaplain I painted, and to make him more like the rest of his flock, he is a custom build. I am still working to figure out how I am going to finish him up. To make him distinct from the others, he will be in stark white armor.

• A 10-man Tactical Squad. These are built and primed. I am going to try a new painting method to get that Raven Guard black to look good. If I could go back to choose another a Space Marine chapter to paint, it would not be a black one. Black requires a great deal of subtlety to pull off really well- subtlety that I am often sorely lacking. I am working up from a black primer, base coating in Charadon Granite, highlighting in grays, and washing these out with coats Badab Black. The various details, such as shoulder pads and weapons, are painted at particular stages as required. It seems to work okay, but is time intensive and the results are less than satisfying.  

To complete my 1500 point Tau list I need to finish:

• Two Devilfish transports. These have been base-coated and some details filled in. I need to wash them with the ubiquitous Devlan Mud and start on the final details. I have magnetized both already and the drones are completely done. Due to an over excited use of weathering powder, I will probably redo the four engine pods. I was never happy with them anyway and they aren't that hard to work on. 

My 2000 point list requires me to finish:

• 10 Kroot from the Banana squad. These are base-coated and some details need to be added in before washing them, highlighting, rinsing and repeating.

• 10 Kroot from the Tomato squad. These are basically in the same state of completion as the above squad. 

Wow. So close. 

Those Orks in the drawer are getting restless.